I sometimes think about the struggles we as heavy people go through and the fact that in society heavy people are generally looked down on because of their size and the stigma that goes with that, and what I mean is that if a 500 pound man is walking through a mall people make comments about that man and do it so blatantly as to say it out loud and within earshot of said person and thats ok with most people because it is the fat guys fault that he is fat, isn't it? even if it is their fault who is the other anonymous person to say so in a rude public manner? I will admit to being on the end of some of those comments here and there through life and some of the time they are let go, mostly when its a kid or something because thats not exactly malicious behavior as much as its just something different through child's eyes but when its an adult that says it? or a teenage kid? I have been known to turn towards them and ask them to repeat it to my face and ya know what, I have never had someone take me up on the offer, and yet this behavior is accepted by most people and no one blinks an eye to actions like that.
I am now at a size where I just look like a huge guy more than a huge fat guy and that is what I can relate to, I have always been a big guy and now that I am at a closer to normal weight, even though 394 lbs is not a "normal size" and more like Gorilla sized, it is closer and my being six foot five helps with that as well. I have "got my cockiness back" says my wife, she has been joking with me lately calling me "vain" and what not and I just think to myself "isn't that part of the point?" BUT in my defense I am not vain, just got my juju back I think. I look in a mirror now and see me looking back and when I look at old photos of me when I was 500 plus pounds I honestly think "wow who is that guy" and I can remember looking in mirrors and thinking well if I cut my beard this way I will look less fat, stretching my face in odd directions to make my face look thinner in essence convincing myself that it was just a bit of weight and things along those lines, and now I look in the mirror and just smile.
where is he going with this? I don't even know where I am going with this post, lately when I start typing out a post I just let my mind wander and 40 minutes later between putting fires out with the kiddos and making lunch or breakfast a post is here I click publish and poof another entry. what have we learned today kids? fat people are just regular people just like you who are not over weight, sometimes when you point and laugh the Gorilla turns around and charges the cage and scares the excrement out of you, and I am not vain, confident? sure, vain? nah. Thanks for reading along and I wish you success along your weight loss journey.