With the weather getting nice I am running into an uncomfortable situation with my clothing, ya see the top of me is a comfortable 2xl and where my gut use to be comes in at a 3xl so finding clothes that look decent is becoming a task. I have one shirt that fits me perfectly and the rest look god awful or too tight which I guess equates to god awful and now that its warm out I will be forced into wearing shirts that are too big up top or too small down below and this is bugging the shit out of me and its only the first week of warm weather! I loved this fall and winter because I don't look half bad in my hoodie as it hides the loose skin issue that I am seeing, I mean don't get me wrong it looks better than the filled out gut but man I'm tellin ya. The thing about it is that I CAN see that its shrinking up somewhat but I am losing weight faster than it shrinks so I am left with a gut that looks bigger than it is because of the skin.
This week its been in the high 50's outside and I am finding that nothing I own for shirts fits! I have some 3xl Adidas tee shirts that I bought in the beginning of the winter and they are loose now so look bad and everything else that I own is either 3xlt or 4xl and well yeah. I have a Reebok sweatshirt that fits me good and I have been using it at the gym over my tee shirts but it will be way too warm for that soon and I will be stuck, whats a guy to do? This is a very frustrating situation for me because there is no amount of work that I can put in and change it, I am stuck with this until it either shrinks and tightens up some or I get a surgery down the line and either one of those is a wait kind of thing so nothing that will be fixed in my immediate future.
Part of my plan is to bulk back up some by weight lifting to help fill in some of the shar pei effect that I have going on but again that's something that will take some time. I am starting to see results with the weights and I have mentioned in earlier posts that my chest and arms are starting to show some definition through the skin but I think that I am going to have to get a lot bigger for it to make a real difference. Lifting weights and getting some of my bulk back has always been the plan and I am looking forward to getting in some serious lifting as I don't really consider what I am currently doing serious as much as base building and getting my muscles back into a routine so that when it is time to start serious lifting I am ready. My legs are actually huge right now muscle wise and its no wonder with carrying 500 plus pounds around for all of that time but in all honesty the bike riding and weight lifting that I have been doing on my legs has got to be making a difference also because when I say my legs are big I mean there is definition there that almost makes them not match the loose skin on the rest of my body.
Since I mentioned my legs I will mention my jeans and how they fit, I currently have a few pairs of 42 waist jeans that I wear BUT they are seriously loose on me and without a belt they will fall down with my first step. I have a size 44 belt that I have punched 3 holes in so far so that I can keep using it and I need to punch one in it now because its getting loose again so I am not really sure what size jeans I should be wearing but I am less concerned with that because I wear my jeans loose and the belt cinched up takes care of them falling down. I mention my pants because they are going down in size faster than my shirts and I figure that's because of the skin on my upper body (belly) area and I wear my jeans lower than I probably should (always have) but it is an indication that I am getting smaller either way and my gut is forcing me to wear super big shirts or suffer tight ones.
So you see my predicament right now with the weather warming and not being able to find something that fits properly. I stopped by the local Big and Fat shop over the weekend and tried on a few shirts in different brands and they either fit perfectly on top and were tight on the bottom or fit on the bottom and were very loose on top so I passed on all of them. I can't see buying an off branded shirt for $20 that doesn't fit right and that $20 was the sale price! when I have a whole closet of shirts that don't quite fit right at home. I have 3 of the same Adidas shirts because when I bought them they fit perfect for the size I was when I purchased them and I am on the lookout for the next shirt that fits so that I can buy 3 or 4 of them again but this time around its proving harder than it has been in the past.
More of a talking out loud, or typing out loud if you will kind of post today because of this problem that's coming on strong lately and it is directly related to my weight loss so I thought I would share. I can't exactly go through the summer in a hoodie or sweatshirt and it is what it is but man I tell ya its more frustrating that I wanted to believe it would be when I first started thinking about the fact that it would eventually be a reality for me. This will work itself out because there is nothing else that can happen so no point in stressing over it too much, but that doesn't mean that I won't be frustrated with it because imagine busting ass as hard as I am to eat right and exercise every day and not being able to see the results as strongly as they are felt which Isuppose could be called a Vain look at it but it is what it is.
I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin and right now with this new issue of nothing fitting and the weather warming up its whats on my mind.
Thats all I got.