Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Step back, look at that picture from an older angle and think about it.

The thing about weight loss on a large scale is that it must consume you, it must become like a job, it is something that is on the mind of the loser 100% of the time and it has to be this way. I would suspect that people with less weight to lose experience this on a smaller scale or perhaps I am wrong and they experience it just the same as a one time mammoth such as myself. I am finding that the closer I get to my "goal" weight which that number was basically pulled from a hat that it is harder to get the weight coming off in as big of chunks as it once did. I am still three hundred twenty some odd pounds and its slowing down but I don't think that its a physical thing, what I mean is that I believe I am doing what I need to do for the most part but I am letting myself get away with more than I have in the past during this trip to a slimmer me.

There was a time during this process where I was the biggest pain in the ass in the world if you had invited me to dinner, I would walk in with my salter scale asking a ton of questions about how the food was prepared. Under one arm would be my light salad dressing and under the other the remainder of my gallon of green tea for the day and I would weigh every bite of food and writing it down so that later I could transfer it to my excel sheet. My mother in law would call and ask "How do you want this prepared? what sides can you have? if I use x amount of butter is that ok?" so on and so on, and this helped immensely more than she probably knows but a pain in the ass I was none the less. Now a days I "eyeball" lots of things and honestly there is no doubt in my mind that I am as close as a person can be to the actual measurement without actually using a measuring tool but it still leaves room for error..um yeah we will call the extra scoop of this or that error for todays discussion and I need to get back on the strict wagon at least until I get under 300 pounds.

Random insert of last nights salmon dinner, 475 total calories for the plate.

Lately I am relaxed where my intake is the subject matter, I was in NYC last week and started off well enough by going to Fresh & co after the Dr. Oz show and got some whole wheat crusted veggie pizza and a bottle of water but after that not so much. We ordered a pizza up to or room and I had 3 slices that night which is leaps and bounds better than how it use to go down and the fact that we would have ordered 2 pizzas but still, pepperoni pizza? I know that I am doing this and its because I am back to the way I use to be, you know that I am unstoppable feeling, well its back. I have written in this blog about how I was always a bigger guy but that people had an image of me as that big guy that could do anything, I ran, I climbed, I worked 12 hour days digging holes and pouring cement and I worked in a lumber yard stacking, loading and climbing racks like a monkey, when I say that I did not let being a big guy get in my way I mean it. I am at a point where I am doing whatever I want to again and perhaps its getting in the way of my end game because its been too long since I got some big numbers off and kept the momentum, it seems that as of late I get a roll going and then something happens that gets in the way, and by something happens of course I mean I relax.

I set a goal for myself to be at or under 300 pounds by April 2nd 2010 and looking at the numbers I do believe that I will fall short but that doesn't mean I will not try to get it. I was on a roll and doing great but have had some distractions that kept me from staying 100% focused on that goal and I am left with having to lose 3.4 pounds per week until April 2nd to make this goal and thats going off of my this mornings weight. I will have some big numbers in the coming weeks as I am going to amp up the cardio a bit at the gym because I can taste sub 300 pounds at this point. Breaking out of this "I'm comfortable" mode is proving harder than I thought it would be, I knew that it would come at some point but man I gotta get it out of here so that I can get to that tape waiting for me at the end of the road.

I talked about the weight loss game having to consume a person for it to work and I think that it was an easier thing when I was worried about death on a daily basis than now. I am getting stronger by the day, I am physically capable of lasting longer in something that takes good cardiovascular conditioning to accomplish and my clothing keeps getting looser despite the fact that the weight has slowed. I think that its time for that pain in the ass that use to carry his salter scale around to return for a while because I am going to get to my bottom goal weight in 2010, not "going to try" not "I hope" but I WILL be there before too long. My habits have changed completely in the past two years, I have gone from a guy that sat around wishing that he could do things to a guy that does the things now, I make excuses to move now a days and look for things that will get me moving instead of sitting on my posterior.

That's all I got for today, make sure to tune in tomorrow for the next adventure of Fatman and Blobin, thanks for following along.

As Ever
Me

10 comments:

  1. Funny how that creeps up on our journey. Just this morning I laid out a plan to be 'on the wagon' for a few days. I've been letting my feet dangle over the side way too much lately. Enjoyed the Dr. Oz show and yes I did see you! I noticed they put the giants in the back for the Richard Simmons segment.

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  2. You mentioned "100% Focus" and how distractions interfered with your focus... this is exactly the thing that I've been struggling with for a very long time.

    I'd put a ton of effort into staying on the straight and narrow... and a "distraction" would cause me to veer from my course and I'd start to lose focus, relax and slowly ease back into my old ways.

    I've recently made a conscious effort to effort to replace the word "distraction" with "life". Lets face it; life is full of distractions. I've realized the key is trying to look at each curve-ball life throws at me as an individual hurdle to get over/past before I can refocus on my goals.

    I don't think 100% is attainable, but if I go out with a buddie and sub come to a pizza temptation... oh well it's only 1 meal and I get try to refocus on the next meal.

    If my knee gives out on me and I can't exercise for a week & I eat poorly out of self pity... oh well next Monday is a new week & a try to refocus on my objectives.

    I'm currently still struggling with this concept, but I'm improving with every day, week and month that passes.

    My hope is that some day I'll be able to accept life's distractions as a temporary challenge to overcome and not an invitation to let me lose focus on what's important.

    I guess it's just "A State of Mind"

    Oh and by the way... you're doing amazing!

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  3. Helen, I was in the back by design...MY design! lol I had no clue they were going to have us do something like that so to the back I went to "pretend" to follow along ;)

    Bryguy, Thanks for the comment ;) I do believe that its a state of mind, I am still there just kind of maintaining which is good that I can do that without gaining anything but a bit early on that maintenance boat I think is all ;)

    As Ever
    Me

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  4. WOW! I so needed to read that this week- as I am also ramping back up.. been a few months of SLOW SLOW moving scale... and a few months of not being as motivated to work out... it is starting to come back... and yep! Gotta start being "difficult" at restaurants etc- tuna in a cup instead of a sandwich... it's a pain- but it's what made me successful to begin with. I have lost 131 as of this morning! I still want about 20 more... and I KNOW I am going to have to WORK for those... I am ready! THANK YOU for the words today!!

    La-

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  5. I hear what you're saying about focus and I agree that we have to become obsessed with it if it is to work. Yet I also hate the fact that my life has been totally focussed on my weight/size. I often think about the fact that we create what we focus on, and often wonder if part of my struggle is caused by my focus on it. I seem to be going round and round in circles. BTW, I am totally in awe of your success. Keep it up!

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  6. I can relate. Sometimes I don't feel fat enough to try hard enough. I need to just do it al regardless because I am obese regardless of how I feel!

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  7. I started letting myself get away with things, too, and unfortunately, the scale went up. You and I are about the same weight right now, and I think getting to 300 by April 2nd is a great goal. I'll aim to do the same!

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  8. Being "relaxed" is another word for "overconfidence" and is exactly what I mentioned in a previous comment, that I saw it coming. Been there so many times myself, it's like a well beaten path.

    Being confident in making the end goal is fabulous. Being confident in eyeballing portions, in thinking that this extra or that extra isn't going to hurt is pure mind games.

    Yep, you are so close you can taste it and it is so exciting to be able to watch you work towards it. However, a cautionary tale is always worth hearing....getting too confident can undo and delay goals in a heart beat. Count, measure, record all. It's a tool to weight loss, not a chore.

    You've got what it takes, work it like it was the first day.

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  9. Hey there,

    I watched the Oz show for the first time just to see if you were on. It was a good show. How nice that memory will be for you. I saw you several times, how fun! By the way, you didn't "fake" the exercise part to well :-)

    Andrea

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  10. I watched the Oz show for the first time to see if you were on there. I saw you several times. How fun! What a fun memory that will be.

    You didn't "fake" the exercise segment very well! :-)

    Andrea

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