Wednesday, February 3, 2010

You ain't got the balls son.

If you are going to try and lose weight, especially from a hyper obese state (yeah I just said hyper obese) You have to do it with everything that you have inside of yourself, if you don't you are just kidding yourself because there are no halfhearted attempts with success. Walking for 5 minutes is all that some of us can do at first yet pride stops us from doing it, somehow pulling back into our shells and hiding from the world is a better option and to that I say bullshit. I can only now say it so strongly just how bullshit being that way is because I powered past the self pity and decided that I did not care what anyone else might say or think of the 500 pound guy waddling around the block, every day I got dressed and I did it until I was the 400 pound guy and with every pound I was able to do more and the weight keeps dropping off. I don't give a shit about what the next guy can do, I have to care about what I can do and more importantly perhaps what I cannot do because of the fat that was and is hanging off of my bones and keep that in mind with every step taken towards better health and the end game result that I am looking for.

Joining a gym was huge for me, I was scared of what the next person might say or think about what I was doing or not doing and I honestly thought it was going to be an all eyes on me thing but to my surprise it wasn't. Nobody cared what I was doing and I couldn't care less what any of them are doing because its me that I am there for. I sing out loud from time to time at the gym and I don't care, I cannot do a pull up yet, notice that I said yet because I will do a pull up before I am done and it will be the first one of my life when I get there but I will in fact do it. There is no one that will stop me because I need to complete what I have started and I am in the opinion that anyone can do what I have with nothing more than a decision. Doing what is right for our health is easier than not doing anything about it and ending up having diabetes, to be carried out of your home through a hole in the wall cut by the fire department, bad knees, sore backs, heart problems, a bitter disposition and tons of smaller problems that are with us on a day to day.

Deciding that living is a better idea than slowly killing yourself with a lack of care for the most important and basic item in your life is something that all people who are over weight should look at closely. If we don't take care of us the rest of whats left really doesn't matter so much because without our health we miss out on the most elementary of things. Without our health what do we have? sure we can live and have a life but is it the life that we want? does anyone really want to gasp for air because they had to walk to the bathroom? I think not.

I use to care what someone else might think of me as I huffed and puffed around attempting to get healthier, I hid in my house on my stationary bike for the longest time and honestly it did serve its purpose but I am at a point that if someone doesn't like what they see that's on them. I will get where I am going and there is no one that will stop me, something clicked at the gym a few days ago as I sat on a leverage shoulder press machine listening to my mp3 player and I have been a zone since then. Taking a line from Phil Anselmo "I live it every day, While you’re mind’s far away, I’m out here putting pride on the line And you case on me with pure respect, One chance at one thing, Hard time is coming, My time, your pain I reign on you" is the place where my head is right now, water is wet, ice is cold I am going to get where I need to go, all of these things are facts.

If you are contemplating starting a better health/weight loss program do yourself a favor and stop thinking about it and start with the doing because at the end of the day when we look into that mirror the person staring back is the one responsible for everything that we do.

As Ever



    I'm a man who has lost 121 lbs since 2009 and have 230 lbs to go. I know from where you speak - and I've had the EXACT same feelings. I'm at the point I don't give a crap either - I hired a personal Trainer - and I huff and sweat just like everybody else. I feel great and I will get it done.

    Thanks, man!!!

  2. I have been following your blog for quite some time. I am also blogging about my own weight loss journey, working on losing 152 pounds, with 47 pounds lost so far. Whether it is 50 pounds or 500, it takes old fashioned hard work.

    I only mention my own deal is because I also believe it is all about discipline and "just doing it" but I have to say that often I get discouraged reading your blog because I get the impression you are pep talking yourself more than you realize and feel as though I am watching a speeding train that may soon crash. Been there, done that and all that. Lost well over 120 pounds 3 times in my life...thinking each time I would never EVER gain the weight back. Even kept the weight off for 7 years once...but here I am AGAIN.

    It's all too common to get a significant amount of weight loss accomplished and taking on a cannot fail attitude, making it sound as though there is no way you can be broken at this point. That's a crash waiting to happen.

    The unmentionable truth is that obesity and all the crap tangled up in it is not lost with the weight. Losing weight is only a part of the equation, it is changing your body size. What about your head size? One day you will not be able to attend the gym with the devotion you have now, when you are so intent on a goal. One day you will be overconfident that that extra bite of food won't hurt, there will always be stress, desire for food and set backs. What will you do then is what I bet some of your readers will be interested in seeing you deal with.

    I notice that you gloss over some of your own stress situations/ eating choices and focus the blog on your accomplishments and dedication. I wonder if it might give both you and your readers a bit more insight to the real struggles that occur, the daily decision to eat this or not that, what it feels like to make that decision and so on.

    I hope you take this comment as positive criticism. I certainly don't expect you to publish this at all, hoping I can just let you know what a reader thinks. You have done a fantastic job of making it happen, and you are focused and steamrolling it with determination. I just feel that a crash could happen if you don't grasp how significant all the small stuff is, not just the accomplishments.

  3. ZMB, just found your blog - fascinating read. This reminds me of my first attempt at exercise on an old exercise bike. I was so obese and out of shape, I had to pedal for 3 minutes and rest for 2 and even that only a few times. But gradually (sometimes miserably) worked up to riding for 30 minutes straight. Same experience as a newbie runner. But breaking it down and adding a bit more every week, it's amazing to experience what our bodies are capable of.

  4. Wow! Good and interesting post and the same goes for the comments. I also am on the journey, although I have decided to not focus on weight loss as much as exercise activity (riding my bike). I got tired of feeling dejected after counting calories for several "good days", then falling into bad habits with some "bad days". My goal is to just "keep riding".

    We all have our own path on this. I am sure that you feel glad that people care about your effort and success so far. Keep it up!

    Big Clyde

  5. Awesome post!! Are you single?

  6. Andrew, always a pleasure :)

    Anonymous, The best post ever? thanks!

    Three, I'm sorry that you have had so many failures with weight loss (a lot of people have me included) projecting your negativity unto others only proves why you can't keep it off, as I believe that being negative will bring negative results. if you believe that I am a train waiting to crash that's fine because opinions are like belly buttons, everyone has one and some of them stink. you will be waiting a long time for that derailment I am afraid but the admission is free so please sit down and grab a bowl of popcorn and watch someone succeed. after reading your comment it is OBVIOUS that you have NOT been reading my blog for "quite some time" but hey! oh and as soon as you start cutting a check to me for writing this blog you can dictate what "my readers will be interested in seeing me deal with" until then ya get what I write ;) if you don't like blunt and honest then you are on the wrong blog.

    Fitfunk, I agree that we don't know what we are capable of until we try it ;), I started out walking and the on a craigslist stationary bike and rode it till I broke it! lol now I run/walk in the warmer months along with hiking and riding my bike, and I started utilizing a gym about 4 months ago ;)

    Clyde, good luck to you and your health!

    shihtzuma, I am not single, happily married! but ya sure know how to make a fella blush ;)

    Thanks for the comments guys!

    As Ever