Since weighing in on Friday everything that I have chosen to do that is directly related to this weight loss program that I am on has been full of Fail. for the first time since starting down this path I am not in control, that old fatter me was driving or the past three days and I am pissed at myself for it. I do not like writing in this blog when it is not positive and my momma always said iffin ya got nothing nice to say, keep that mouth shut, but I deserve to out myself for the past four days of NOT doing what I NEED to be doing so here it is.
Saturday I counted my calories right up until dinner time when I decided to order a Chicken parm grinder from the local pizza house, and on the side I had 2 slices of bacon pizza off of a small pie. Later Saturday night we watched a movie and I had my big ol bowl of popcorn that I always have with a movie. Then there was Sunday, the only good thing about Sunday was that I literally did not stop moving all day, wify bought a space at a flea market and off we went @ 7AM and we stayed until 1:30PM up $160 minus the $15 space fee so that was good and all I ate at that point was a bowl of cereal and a peanut butter and jelly sammie that I brought along, then when we got home somehow we ended up basically landscaping almost my entire front and side yard but that meant that dinner was late and someone decided that KFC was on the menu this is where the bucket of fail entered. I was HUNGRY by the time that dinner walked through the door from all of the yard work and I did not hold back, this is where you should brace yourself. I ate 2 breasts, 1 Thigh, 2 biscuits w/gravy, 2 T Mac n cheese and 2 T of mashed potatoes and honestly I did not enjoy the meal at all, maybe the first piece tasted good but only for a split second, and that will conclude the weekend.
Monday came around and I had about 750 calories left for dinner and we ended up stopping at Subway, no worries right? wrong! I ordered a foot long Subway melt with provolone and mayo on it and shared a small bag of cool ranch doritos with my daughter so I did go over calories yesterday. Now for today, This morning started off well enough once again but around dinner time I ate extra rice as well as extra peas with my Gortons fish fillets which would have put me over my calories for the day but then I added a Fiber one bar because "I needed something sweet" and about 45 minutes after that (just before the biggest loser started) I had 2 dannon light and fit yogurts, well I'll tell ya something, I bet they are not so light nor fit when you eat two after your calorie limit is gone for the day!
I have since Saturday had exactly 1 gallon of green tea and maybe 2 gallons of water, that's four days! I usually have 1.5 gallons PER DAY! so to say that I am dehydrated is an understatement, let me put it this way as I am typing this the taste of chapstick is on my dried lips. I have not been getting enough sleep either, last night I was up until 3am researching some lakes and streams in the area to go fishing in on the 18th as opening day is upon us. Now let us talk about the exercise, I have done none since Friday besides the yard work and flea market and that my friends is not the way to lose weight.
Now that I have demonstrated how NOT to do it, I am back to my old self...er..my New old self! because I did not lose 190 pounds to just have a few days like that pull me into some sort of a spiral or even just a slight back up because that is not how I get down anymore. I am honestly pissed off at myself for the last four days worth of eating and not exercising not to mention the lack of drinking anything so tonight is the end of that.
I have no clue what the scale will say this week but I am heavier today than I was on Friday, whatever it is I have to accept it because I am the one making the choices.
Saturday I counted my calories right up until dinner time when I decided to order a Chicken parm grinder from the local pizza house, and on the side I had 2 slices of bacon pizza off of a small pie. Later Saturday night we watched a movie and I had my big ol bowl of popcorn that I always have with a movie. Then there was Sunday, the only good thing about Sunday was that I literally did not stop moving all day, wify bought a space at a flea market and off we went @ 7AM and we stayed until 1:30PM up $160 minus the $15 space fee so that was good and all I ate at that point was a bowl of cereal and a peanut butter and jelly sammie that I brought along, then when we got home somehow we ended up basically landscaping almost my entire front and side yard but that meant that dinner was late and someone decided that KFC was on the menu this is where the bucket of fail entered. I was HUNGRY by the time that dinner walked through the door from all of the yard work and I did not hold back, this is where you should brace yourself. I ate 2 breasts, 1 Thigh, 2 biscuits w/gravy, 2 T Mac n cheese and 2 T of mashed potatoes and honestly I did not enjoy the meal at all, maybe the first piece tasted good but only for a split second, and that will conclude the weekend.
Monday came around and I had about 750 calories left for dinner and we ended up stopping at Subway, no worries right? wrong! I ordered a foot long Subway melt with provolone and mayo on it and shared a small bag of cool ranch doritos with my daughter so I did go over calories yesterday. Now for today, This morning started off well enough once again but around dinner time I ate extra rice as well as extra peas with my Gortons fish fillets which would have put me over my calories for the day but then I added a Fiber one bar because "I needed something sweet" and about 45 minutes after that (just before the biggest loser started) I had 2 dannon light and fit yogurts, well I'll tell ya something, I bet they are not so light nor fit when you eat two after your calorie limit is gone for the day!
I have since Saturday had exactly 1 gallon of green tea and maybe 2 gallons of water, that's four days! I usually have 1.5 gallons PER DAY! so to say that I am dehydrated is an understatement, let me put it this way as I am typing this the taste of chapstick is on my dried lips. I have not been getting enough sleep either, last night I was up until 3am researching some lakes and streams in the area to go fishing in on the 18th as opening day is upon us. Now let us talk about the exercise, I have done none since Friday besides the yard work and flea market and that my friends is not the way to lose weight.
Now that I have demonstrated how NOT to do it, I am back to my old self...er..my New old self! because I did not lose 190 pounds to just have a few days like that pull me into some sort of a spiral or even just a slight back up because that is not how I get down anymore. I am honestly pissed off at myself for the last four days worth of eating and not exercising not to mention the lack of drinking anything so tonight is the end of that.
I have no clue what the scale will say this week but I am heavier today than I was on Friday, whatever it is I have to accept it because I am the one making the choices.
As Ever
Me
You still have many days to make up for your bad days. Try to get in some extra exercise (burn off cals) and keep on your low end of calories. Good luck on the scale. How about a challenge? This week if you lose weight, maybe start working on your couch to 5K.
ReplyDeleteI always say if you have nothing nice to say then it MUST BE TIME TO BLOG IT :)
ReplyDeleteBut that's me.
my fave thing about t his post is that you dont play the blame game at all.
you own your choices and THAT is why you will be successful....
Miz.
You WILL be successful because you already are. Here's the thing. I think sometimes when we approach "new" territory something just takes over and we begin to self destruct. Believe me, I've done it enough times to know. Self examination and honesty - which it seems you are already doing - are the best way to dig ourselves out because then you can maybe figure out why, why, why. Last night on Biggest Loser Sione had fallen below the yellow line and Laura had the only vote to determine who left. His opinion was this: Laura wasn't determining his fate, HE WAS because he fell below the yellow line. That just really struck me. That's a man who will never go back because he is OWNING HIS OWN FUTURE. You too. Own it baby.
ReplyDeleteGetting back on track can be easy or it can be hard. Your choice. I'm sure you'll make the right one.
ReplyDeleteLike I say to everybody though, you better get back on plan 'cause you don't want me knocking on your door. Nope. :)
While reading this latest entry in your blog, I was ready to see a royal falling off of the wagon - The way you led into the story, I figured I would see four days of 3500+ cals a day. And yet - you didn't. Yeah, you went over. But - you didn't blow a year's (plus) of hard work. You didn't revive the "old" you. Get past it, pick up where you left off, and (as you so often eloquently put it), keep on keepin' on. After all, we are all only human - mistakes happen - even if they are either "ooops"'s or intentional. None of us can claim perfection, so forgive yourself and get back in there!!!
ReplyDeleteTony, way to go on your positive attitude and putting it behind you. That's all we can do. You've done so wonderful no reason to beat yourself up over a couple of days. I'm sure being so close to that 200 lbs gone mark is playing some head games with you too. This journey sure is a mental game too. Here's to a good rest of the week and lots of green tea.
ReplyDeleteMeh- we all "mess up" now and then- but really you could have done worse. I bet the "old you" would have eaten twice that (I know the old me would have). Don't be so hard on yourself :)
ReplyDeletehey Tony...
ReplyDeleteI'm still here following you, and felt this was the post to chime in. I think this journey of yours, well is nothing short of amazing. I believe you had a bad few days, and tomorrow will be different. The interesting things here is, is the old Tony didnt stop. You are a much smarter person now. So well educated on the do's and dont's. Women can blame it on their hormones, give yourself forgiveness and start tomorrow with a LARGE glass of water, and tell yourself, you're back in the game.