Friday has come and I have not exercised all week because of this chest congestion and sore throat that I have been dealing with, I put C25K on hold all week but I kept the intake where it needs to be and decided early on in the week that I would be happy this week if I could hold onto the loss from last week without a gain. I will get right to it and say that I am down 1.4 pounds from last Friday coming in at 333.0 pounds, I must say that I am pleased with that as a loss is a loss in my book. This week brings the objects that I weigh as much as I do and as much as I have lost back and with that have a look.
201 pounds gone and another 58 to go to hit my goal of weighing 275 pounds, My best guess would never have had me at more than 200 pounds lost at this juncture of my journey, in fact when I began I thought that 100 pounds in the first year would have been pushing it. I struggle with the fact that I am more than 200 pounds lighter than I was a short time ago where how I look enters the picture. Walking through Walmart last night I saw a fella whom I thought was my approximate size and sized him up a bit thinking about how he and I were comrades in fat floating through the store together so I asked Wify "How close to that guys size am I?" just to get confirmation on my thought. Wify looked at me as if I had a turnip growing out of my forehead and said "You are not even close to his size" so I took another glance but what I saw was me again, "Are you sure you are not just being nice?" I asked her and she then just said "Shut up Tony, stop playing dumb, you are not even close" in that way that only a loving wife could say it, From her answer I have to believe her but at the same time he was honestly how I see myself, so maybe I need to face the fact that I have lost a lot of weight.
I think a lot of people have the issue of not being able to see the weight loss even though it may be obvious to most people, I mean I know that I am not thin by any stretch of the word but I may not be considered HUGE to all people now either. I bought a shirt recently and tried it on last night and felt that it was too tight on me so I of course asked for Wify's opinion and she said "I know that you don't like when your shirts touch your belly but that one just looks like it fits" of course I had to have her take pictures from all sides so that I could determine whether I would be comfortable wearing this new shirt outside the house and of course it looked just fine on me, when will this unsure feeling go away? Honestly, I am still 333 pounds so it isn't like I am small or something so there is some weight behind how I feel but how will I feel at 275 pounds? or even 250 pounds? is Wify doomed am I doomed to taking pictures of my self in new clothing for eternity? or does this go away? hopefully the latter but right now I still feel like my old rotund self more often than not when I try on anything new or see other big people.
With all of that said, I am a different person than I was 17 months ago, I am more than 200 pounds lighter than I was 17 months ago, I am going to drive my beautiful wife nuts with my ever growing insanity and obsession with weight loss and better health, I am going to weigh less than 275 pounds sooner than later.
Try and stop me, go ahead I dare ya.