Wednesday, March 28, 2012

It's alive!!! but I ain't got no bolts in my neck.

Its been a while where I find myself with some time to sit down and write a post so since I had a couple minutes I thought it was time for an update. Point blank I have been struggling since June 2011, a personal tragedy is making things hard on me and focusing has not been easy so we get what we have here, some weight gain. I hit a point where I started remembering some of the struggles of being 534 pounds and with a lot of thought ie: Jedi mind tricks on myself, I have been on a roll for about a month now again where I am doing everything right.

To say that weight loss is a mental game would pretty much sum it up because if you are defeated mentally I doubt many people would be able to keep it together when it comes to something as difficult as staying focused in the face of stress. Losing weight is not easy for any person and someone who says that its easy is just plain lying to you, its a simple thing but easy it is not and there in lies the problem. I have come from 534 pounds down to as low as 305 in the last four years, I am currently as of this morning at a rotund 363.0 pounds but am riding my bikes almost every day now along with the most basic item in my bag of tricks which is a simple walk every day.

I won't complain or whine about things that make it hard because we all have them but shit just ain't easy sometimes and I won't get into it more than that as focusing on the negative never helped anyone. Instead I chose to focus my energy on a couple things that are possible causes for an issue and I have seemingly come up with a solution as I am again able to stay focused and the weight is coming down again but then again when someone walks a few miles per day and then rides a few more it tends to help in that department so who knows.

Short and sweet is this post so I will end it here, I will also try to get a post up more often because when i start getting emails asking if I am alive obviously someone out there still follows.

Thanks for all of the support over the last couple years its been invaluable.

As ever


  1. Glad to hear you're hanging in there. Yep, it's definitely a mental game. Even after 4+ yrs I'm still learning. The past several weeks it's been learning how I still "use food" as I'm guessing is the case for you. It's tough even thinking how to over come it after doing it for so many years. I know for myself being honest about what I'm doing is key for me, posting my weight regularly really helps too. Think your Friday weigh-in's again would help? I'm rooting for you :) just keep reminding yourself "YOU CAN DO ANYTHING".

  2. I'm sorry to hear that a personal tragedy has entered your life. Sending you some positive energy to help you through...

  3. I always love hearing from you! I can totally get what you're saying about the mental part of it. That is so much harder than anything else. There are so many times now that I try to talk myself out of running thinking I can't do it, when I've done it many many times. It's a sucky feeling. Just know that I think you're such an inspiration. Hang in there and keep fighting, and you'll be fine.

  4. Yeah, we're still out here. And, yeah, we're still pulling for you.

    Here's hoping things get better for you. You still inspire me.

  5. Sorry things have so rough, I do hope you'll start posting again, I always enjoy reading your posts.

  6. Still here and still pulling for you. Battles suck, but they are worth fighting. I'll remind you if you remind me. You are inspirational...


  7. this is going to sound kind of stalkerish, and maybe it is, but... i found you on sparkpeople and have been checking on you occasionally for about four years now. i think it's great that regardless of the hurdles life has thrown at you, you haven't given up. as someone who lost and regained 80lbs, i have somewhat of an idea of what you're up against. stick it out. your sheer determination tells me that you can do this. you have not failed until you have given up.